Think you don’t buy with your feelings? Cute. Open your last 10 purchases and ask yourself what actually made you hit “buy.”
And yes, I can hear you already: “But I researched it first.” Great. That research was part of the feeling. It made the purchase feel safer, smarter, and easier to justify. Surprise. Still emotional.
So if you’re selling something, don’t start with price. Start here: what does this product or service make people feel? Relief? Status? Control? Belonging? That emotional hook is the real reason they pay attention before they ever look at the number.
Now look at that list again and ask yourself: how many of those 10 were driven by some kind of crisis? Not always a giant, movie-trailer crisis. Everyday stuff. The car breaks and suddenly “maybe later” becomes “I need this fixed today.” Someone needs food and can’t afford it, so you buy it because there’s no neat little spreadsheet for being human.
You’re not that different from your customer. You buy emotionally. They buy emotionally. So selling should start with the same question: can I actually connect with this person? If the answer is no, maybe don’t spend six months chasing a deal that was never alive. And if the connection feels instant? Also slow down. Fast chemistry can make people skip steps.
Once the emotional connection is there, then you can start asking the practical questions. These are the things you need to know before a deal has any real chance of getting done.
First, what’s their risk tolerance? Don’t pitch something wildly outside their comfort zone just because you like it. Match where they are, or nudge them slightly past it if that stretch actually helps them grow.
Second, what’s their timeframe? Is this a real opportunity, or are you about to have the same “maybe next quarter” conversation for the next three years? Know that before you build your whole pipeline around hope.
Third, what’s their budget? Same idea as risk tolerance. Don’t sell them something they clearly can’t afford. But also don’t start so small that the purchase feels meaningless. The right number should matter without making them panic.
That is where the real sales conversation starts.
Not with pressure.
Not with pretending every interested person is a buyer.
Emotion gets attention. Crisis creates urgency. But risk, timeframe, and budget decide whether this is a sale or just another charming waste of everyone’s calendar.
Miss one of those, and you are not building a sale.
You are babysitting a maybe.